// Okay. This is ridiculous. //

my brother treats my mom terribly. but I’m the one who gets all the hate for anything that I say. my brother’s over here running three fans in his room to see which one works the best, therefore increasing the electricity bill and possibly starting a fire because two of those fans are broken (and he claims he was trying to figure out which one actually worked). he goes out all the time. almost every night. he gets drunk all the time, gets in car accidents, messes up a car that was virtually SPOTLESS when we bought it, calls my mom in all hours of the night to help him or pick him up, makes her worry so much that she can’t sleep even when she has to get up at 6 for work the next day, doesn’t bring his clothes that SHE washed in the house from the clothes line when she’s asked him to do it THREE times already, only thinks of himself, doesn’t help clean the house AT ALL EVER, even when we needed to because the landlord was coming to basically judge us on how we live. and he doesn’t care. he doesn’t seem to appreciate anything.

i do love my mom very much, but i just don’t say it. i can’t. there’s no way for me to explain why, but you’ll just have to take my word for it. anyway, my brother treats her so terribly, but she takes it. she never says anything to him. he’s never punished. she just lets it go. but if i happen to say something that may have had an irritated tone or something, i get the hugest guilt trip about how i don’t appreciate anything she does for me and how i wouldn’t even notice if she left. i’m sorry that i work a lot and come home only to work more because of the homework or choreography i have to get done. she knows i don’t like being asked a lot of questions, but she hounds me every day. and usually i’m just tired and need some time to just relax before i talk to anyone. but if i initiate a conversation with her, i’m being honest here, generally she shows no interest.

ugghhh, i don’t know what to do here. i love my mom. i appreciate everything she does for me and for my family. i really hate how disrespectful my brother is to her and how she doesn’t say or do anything about it with him.